Tiffany Asked –
Hi Taryn!
I am a true fan of your website and I admire your impeccable style of dress! I first took notice of you in the December issue of Elle and admired your taste and mature and fabulously classic sense of style.
My dilemma: I am currently undergoing chemotherapy treatment for breast cancer (was diagnosed in August – day after I turned 30). I am a housewife and mother of three lovely girls. My husband is an awesome father, excellent provider, supportive, very handsome, and extremely caring (need I go on…he’s my Brad Pitt). Problem is since I’ve been sick I have not been able to be that 1950’s housewife I’ve always strived to become. I have not been able to cook in months (previously, I cooked 4-5 times a week and always tried new meals at least twice a month). In addition, due to the awful side effects of my treatments I am too exhausted to tidy the way I use too and most of all; I have not been able to keep myself looking glamorous, sexy and afloat as previous. Moreover, since the bilateral mastectomy (with reconstruction), weight gain due to medication and the alopecia due to chemotherapy I have been feeling depressed and insecure.
My husband helps out a lot and really tries to encourage me my ensuring this is just temporary, however, I cannot help but feel bad.
Please provide any suggestions and advice as my treatments will soon end and I would really like to become the Stepford Wife my husband adored, admired, and fell in love with. I love “over dressing” me and the girls and would love to get back to doing so (even with the new physical changes: e.g. – hair loss, weight gain: however, new breast!)
Thanks in advance for your time, suggestions and advice!
Sincerely,
Tiffany
Philadelphia, PA
THE WIFE Answered –
Tiffany,
I have to say, You are quite the Mother Warrior… to be dealing with chemotherapy, 3 Kids and still trying to be the perfect WIFE! You are my personal hero!
One of the reasons that makes you such a Great Wife, is that you try to do it all. But it can also be a down fall. I think one of the hardest things about being a Perfect Wife is reliqushing power for other people to help out. Especially in your own home and learning to sit back and let others take over for you. Lord knows this is my weak point and being a perfectionist and hate when other people try to step in.
So for the time being my advice to you…. What would make you the perfect wife is to just sit back and focus on recovering from breast cancer. Rule of Thumb: ‘You cant take care of your family, if you don’t take care of yourself first.’
Focus more on You! You mentioned you had an 18 year old step daughter, This is the perfect time for her to start pitching in more around the house and possibly learn more about cooking. This might be a great oppurtunity for you to teach her a few of your favorite reciepes. Or If you are finaically able, There’s always the idea to hire a housekeeper who won’t mind cooking a few meals a week. And if your 11 year old is responsible enough to start babysitting your youngest ( 2 1/2 ) while your still home and need a few moments for your self in another room.
I know in my heart, you are an amazing Mother and Wife! Keep pampering yourself and know you deserve it! Stay optimistic and Postive.
THE WIFE xoxo
Also Below are a few comfort iteams that might help on the bad days when your not feeling your best…
Barefoot Dreams Blankets and Bathrobes have to be the most soft and cuddy cozy material I have ever put my hand on. Just to wrap yourself in either will make all your trouble melt away.
Signature Barefoot Dreams Blanket
The Colors they come in will accomodate any home decor
Visit
Barefoordreams.Com
Sonoma Blankets! Oh My Where do I begin….
These thick soft Lavendar scented blankets you put in the microwave. Once they get all nice and hot, wrap them around you, and the intoxicating aroma of lavender will relax you immediatly! This has to be one of my favorite finds yet!
Sonoma Lavendar Spa Blankets are available at Burke Williams or Amazon.Com
( Me in my Favorite Ever Pink Party Dress! Obnoxiously Over Dressed! )
Marilyn Asked :
“This Erin Featherson Dress is Fab and I would love to wear it to some fab event alas i live in super understated new york. How do you Suggest mere mortals wear it even if they have no where to go?”
The Wife Answered :
My rule is this… All women should be in dresses after 7:00pm. The second part of my rule is that, I over dress for anything and everything, whether it be a cocktails or Lunching with friends. The poofy-er the dress the better, The Brighter the dress the better. My inspiration came from watching Carrie Bradshaw in “Sex and The City.” she was always in a fabulous dress no matter what the occasion. You’ll be remembered by friends and aquintances more over the other girls in their jeans and Tee’s. So I say stand out and Be extraordinary!
(See Post Below for “over dressing for everyday errands”)
