I actually really enjoyed reading this article and thought I’d shake things up by posting it. I of course still want a very traditional engagement ring, but this well written article does get you thinking. There is also a great debate video on The Huffington Post website… Here’s the link. Would love to know what you guys think! – Taryn Cox for THE WIFE.
I’ve been in the diamond business for over 10 years. I’ve traveled all over the world buying and selling diamonds. I’ve passed through most of the major airports across the United States with about a million dollars worth of diamonds in a leather wallet stuffed inside my pants. I’ve bought and sold diamonds in Dubai, Mumbai, Moscow, Hong Kong, Paris, Stockholm, Tel Aviv, Madrid and Barcelona. Even today I am involved on the fringe of the diamond business, running a diamond education site helping would-be buyers. Considering my deep personal involvement in the diamond business, my opinion might surprise you —diamonds are a terrible waste of your money.
Here are seven reasons why:
1) The most common misconception about engagement rings is that they’re some kind of ancient tradition that’s deeply embedded in human history in societies around the world. This is completely false. The idea of a diamond engagement ring is roughly a century old. Guess who invented the concept? Not surprisingly, it’s the same people who mined the diamonds — the De Beers diamond syndicate. How far did De Beers go in their quest to create demand for diamonds? Edward Jay Epstein notes in his famous investigative article:
“In its 1947 strategy plan, the advertising agency strongly emphasized a psychological approach. “We are dealing with a problem in mass psychology. We seek to … strengthen the tradition of the diamond engagement ring — to make it a psychological necessity capable of competing successfully at the retail level with utility goods and services….” It defined as its target audience “some 70 million people 15 years and over whose opinion we hope to influence in support of our objectives.” N. W. Ayer outlined a subtle program that included arranging for lecturers to visit high schools across the country. “All of these lectures revolve around the diamond engagement ring, and are reaching thousands of girls in their assemblies, classes and informal meetings in our leading educational institutions,” the agency explained in a memorandum to De Beers.”
I have nothing against clever marketing campaigns, but this is different. It’s not like with cars, for example. You know you need a car, so the car companies compete for your attention with their ads. In this case De Beers spent millions upon millions convincing the public that they needed to buy a product that they basically created out of thin air (thin air that they alone controlled).
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What better gift for newlyweds to kick off their first year of marriage than with a great sex life and a kitchen full of delicious food? Haha! The Joy of Cooking was first published in 1936 and has sold over 18 million copies. The nearly 5,000 recipes are handily organized by meal and ingredient, and no cooking instruction goes unexplained, so you can finally understand the difference between poaching and braising. The book includes nutritional information as well as an extremely helpful list of measures and equivalents. $20.00 on Amazon.com
The Joy of Sex’s new revised edition once again sets the standard as the world’s most trusted sex manual. Useful in more ways than one with new pictures, photographs in addition to the drawings. Also includes new topics like the importance of sex to our growth as people and partners and maintaining a fulfilling sex life as we get older. $16.00 on Amazon.Com
The perfect gift to be wrapped together and or added with money for the Bride and Groom. – Taryn Cox for THE WIFE.
“His stuff, your stuff, now what?”
By Joy Moyler, interior designer author Hautezone.Blogspot.com
As an interior designer with over 25 years in the game, you could say I have endured some design challenges. And now as design head for Armani Casa, Giorgio Armani’s interior design studio, I have been fortunate enough to design home environments for bachelors like singer John Mayer, violinist David Garrett, actor Adrien Brody, and various captains’ of industry. I’ve spent seven years designing showrooms for Ralph Lauren, including the Beverly Hills and New York stores amongst others. But the most challenging feat is often a new home for ‘newlyweds’
Man, Check! Ring, Check! Venue, Check! But did you really, sign on to gaze at that threadbare sofa ‘Til Death Do Us part’? What will your response be when he comes home dripping from sweat, some hazy, hot and humid mid-August summer day during a New York City garbage strike? He walks in, runs his hands through his sweat laden hair, hurls his Kenneth Cole laptop messenger bag to the floor, runs into the kitchen for one, no two, cold ones. Pops the cap, grabs the remote control and salt and vinegar chips, to watch the eighteenth run of Rocky 2 (like he never saw it before), poised to stretch out, feet up and realizes someone moved HIS sofa?
‘Till Death Do Us’ part. Hmmmmm. Sometime in the not-so–wee hours of the night (okay, day after he’d gone to work) the Salvation Army Truck arrived. I know, I know you never saw it coming, didn’t call them, but somehow they managed to enter your newlywed home and haul that raggedy thing to an unknown location. Hmmmm. Where, Oh where are the by-laws buried for the not-so harmonious task of ‘blending furniture’? This was not covered in marriage counseling. If so, the pages must have been stuck together. It is likely easier to ‘blend’ in-laws, and extended families. Well except for the ‘crazy cousin’ no one wants to claim much less talk to.
I am often asked to ‘marry’ styles. Contemporary, with Traditional, Moderne, with Bohemia, French with Vintage Metal, as in Heavy Metal. Generally there has already been a degree of editing done way before I show up. But all too often, there is that one piece that manages to be the ‘button’. The piece that can be a real deal breaker. The one fabric clad (often stained) heavy piece from the ‘hot’ bachelor/bachelorette days that can question your own judgment. The piece that makes you wonder is you should have married ‘Fred’ instead of ‘Ted’. What is the solution?
The answer, in short is ‘diplomacy’. The same level of ‘diplomacy’ required in deciding where to spend the holidays, how to tactfully avoid eating his mamas, overdone pearl onion casserole which is like chewing a plate of marbles, with cheese.
Identify pieces that fit well into the new environment.
When I say ‘fit’, I have four suggestions:
1) Scaled to fit. Do not keep a large sofa in a studio apartment just because your sister gave it to you.
2) Keep ‘non-trendy’ pieces that are in good condition and made well. Even if something is old consider updating with new knobs, pulls, hardware etc. Strip the finish and add a coat of paint. There are numerous shops allowing DIY practicing before committing to an entire job.
3) Make breathing new life into old pieces a ‘date night’. Wear sexy clothing and he will forget you’re ripping the denim fabric off of his favorite football night chair, replacing it with velvet and a colorful Jonathan Adler toss pillow. Whenever, he see’s the chair, he will imagine how much fun you had frolicking on it, forgetting what it used to look like. And if he can’t remember, frolic some more until it’s all he can think about. You know what I mean!
4) 1-800-STO-AWAY and any likely facsimile available in your region. Costs are generally manageable. Who knows, down the road there may be more room for it, or the style will come back. Again, only keep pieces in great condition.
Remember, “keep it moving or be left behind”. So try not to worry about sofas, curios, tables and such. When the music stops, just be glad to have a chair! – Joy Moyer
